Living in the past

I seek my past in the present so as much that I dont know the present exists. It ceases to be there in my timeline. I would do anything to get that broken heart healed or that friend come back to me but what about this lovely picture being painted right in front of me, it doesnt matter I am not part of this. I am the missing piece in anything beautiful.

I brood and cry over whats gone by, I run through each event I spent with you because thats all I have, memories. My life is so desolate without you.

If I have a past and no present, I have absolutely no future. Who cares about the present and the future, I am in love with my past.

Dont shake me, dont wake me, let me go backwards in time and sleep in the coziness of my melancholy to never return again.

Early Education System in India

Early education in India especially in the middle class is about competitiveness, scoring and ranking higher. Every city has its varying degrees of aggressiveness. If one belongs to a city where the education culture is so built around tuitions, prep classes, guides, student groups and school's additional enforcements a student can easily score an admirable percentage in the 10th class.

The fallback of such a system is lack of good development of the child in other aspects of his/her personality. Such children later grow up to become adults who probably are failures in their interpersonal skills, relationships and don’t accept shortcomings easily.

With this said about the tough expectations a student may have to deal with does the scrapping of the 10th class exams help? Not really! Examinations are required to focus a child's faculties towards understanding the subject and giving timelines to see early education to a completion. It’s just the attitude of the parents and teachers that need to be worked upon to bring about seeing examination as a healthy system, rather than having a whole system of guide books, early morning & late evening tuitions to excel.

Nagendra haraya Trilochanaya

Listen to it here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yyLeBNsovQ8

Nagendra haraya Trilochanaya,
Basmanga ragaya maheswaraya,
Nithyaya shudhaya digambaraya,
Tasmai nakaraya namashivaya. 1

My salutations to the letter 'Na' , which is Shiva,
Who wears as garland the king of snakes.
Who has three eyes,
Who wears ash all over Him,
Who is the greatest Lord,
Who is forever,
Who is the cleanest,
And who wears the directions themselves as dress.

Mandakini salila chandana charchithaya,
Nandeeswara pramadha nadha maheswaraya,
Mandara pushpa bahu pushpa supoojithaya,
Tasmai makaraya namashivaya. 2

My salutations to the letter 'Ma' , which is Shiva,
Who is bathed by waters of Ganga,
Who applies sandalpaste all over him,
Who has Lord Nandi as his chieftain,
Who is the greatest lord,
And who is worshipped by Mandhara and many other flowers.

Shivaaya gowri vadanara vinda,
Sooryaya daksha dwara naasakaya,
Sri neela kantaya vrisha dwajaya,
Tasmai sikaraya namashivaya. 3

My salutations to the letter 'Si' , which is Shiva,
Who is peace personified,
Who is like Sun to the Lotus face of Gowri,
Who destroyed the fire sacrifice of Daksha,
Who has a blue neck,
And who has a bull in his flag.

Vasishta kumbhodhbhava gowthamadhi.
Munendra devarchitha shekaraya,
Chandrarka vaiswanara lochanaya,
Tasmai vakaraya namashivaya 4

My salutations to the letter 'Va' , which is Shiva,
Who is worshipped by great sages like
Vasishta, Agasthya and Gowthama,
As also the devas,
And who has sun, moon and fire as his three eyes.

Yaksha swaroopaya jada dharaya,
Pinaka hasthathaya sanathanaya,
Divyaya devaaya digambaraya,
Tasmai yakaraya namashivaya. 5

My salutations to the letter 'Ya' , which is Shiva,
Who takes the form of Yaksha,
Who has a tufted hair,
Who is armed with spear,
Who is forever filled with peace,
Who is godly,
Who is the great God,
And who wears the directions themselves as dress.

Phalasruthi

Panchaksharamidham punyam,
Ya padeth Shiva sannidhou,
Shivaloka mavapnothi,
Shive na saha modathe .

Those who read these holy five letters great,
In the temple of Shiva,.
Would go to the world of Shiva,
And be forever happy with Him.

Translated by P R Ramachander.

Vacationing!!!???

A week back, this vacation I am in,  felt like a very bad timing. AQMI employed 7 new marketing executives and we already had 3 employees. Training of the marketing executives started immediately to induct them into the system and the thought process. Nights when I went to bed it was tiring but I was learning in leaps and bounds. Whatever side of the organization one is, employee or employer, the experience gained is tremendous.

Orane Solutions, our IT company was also gaining some head way. So far we were moving but in small and slow steps. Out of the blue a good deal was on its way. I inititated the activity by meeting the client but the subsquent meetings would be attended by my other 2 partners. Then again, I was reminded this was not a good time to vacation.

Monday, when I was supposed to travel to Gurgaon for my 20 day vacation, the marketing executives had to step out and walk into the client spaces. All set and ready, extremely enthusiastic and excited. I wanted to be part of all this but then I had to go, so here I am. Yesterday evening I heard some good news, the marketing visits were in the positive direction. There were no sales but there was good movement and follow ups needed, which meant lots of hope.

Today, Nagesh and Prasad (my partners in Orane) are working towards meeting the client and also working on the presentation.

So actually I can cool my heels and relax a bit now. This is a well deserved vacation.......:)

And as a true business woman, I wouldnt let this travel expense go a waste. Meeting my cousin who will be heading the north india marketing office of AQMI to train him about the services so that he can market it the right away. Further, taking him along for business discussions as Im looking at office space in Delhi and also seeking business associations.

But what else is the proof that I have time for myself,  I got time to add this post on my blog :)

Coffee and Smokes: Meeting a Senior Manager (#2)

[If you haven’t, please read the earlier series on Jyo before you proceed:

Coffee and Smokes: Intro to Jyo (#1)]

Some of Jyo's amusing encounters ensued at this quiet coffee shop. One balmy afternoon, Jyo is engrossed in figuring out the right abuse she should return to her colleague who never spares any opportunity to denunciate her. It could be her dress/makeup, work, boy friend ...oh anything. That meant Jyo needed to be braced in all fronts. Deep in her thoughts and drag after drag she is oblivious of the man right in front of her. There is a tall, stout, puffed up face, fair-skinned man in a black suit asking her for a light. She passes the light without actually looking at him but he is lingering over seeking her attention.

She looks up to meet his piercing gaze. He doesn’t idle in elucidation and blurts "Can I join you?” She says "Of course" and the huge man is seated facing her like a teenager on his first date. She concludes he is about 35 years. His balding patch in the centre of his head and his face does show that he is a stressed and burdened manager in some company. He introduces himself as "Ram" working as a senior manager in a finance company. He queries about her work and her role at her workplace. She slowly talks about herself. Before she could enquire his details, he pulls out his visiting card and remarks "You wouldn’t have thought I am such a senior manager in a company, people say I look very young for my age and I look like a college student" She smiles and nods to show agreement though in her mind she knows she has guessed his age just right :) He then goes on about his personal life. He is married with kids and mentions about his long marriage to his wife. He further states that it is an intercultural marriage. She could see it in his eyes that he is all bonkers over her. She doesn’t like him at all.

He asks for her mobile number which she is really reluctant to give away. For a moment, she is in contention and tempted to give the wrong number. To end this encounter smoothly, she quickly decides to share her mobile number. He is urgently typing the number on his mobile and presses the call button. He is very pleased to see her mobile ring. He saves the number and well Jyo does it too because she always saves numbers of people she likes and dislikes. If the people who were a bother called her she could disconnect or ignore it :) After a few minutes of chat she departs with an excuse that work is waiting and proceeds to her workplace. As she is walking back, she sees a message from Ram: “Jyo, It was great meeting you, please keep in Touch. Love Ram”. "Hey Ram" she thinks “What a prick??!!”

To be named poem

खलकियत नवाज़िश शफकत को भुलादीया
ना गवारी ने उसको नस्ल परस बनादीया
राह तक गयें हम मोहब्बत के पैगाम का
आबो दानाह गुज़र गयी आपके तनफ्फुर का


[to be completed]

Amused?

I liked these quotes, picked up from Readers Digest:


Sympathy: What one girl offers in exchange for details -Aubrey B


If you have integrity, nothing else matters
If you dont have integrity, nothing else matters
-Alan Simpson, Former US Senator

Silent cry

When the vocal fights are futile
There commences the long silent wars
Reticent as the night but raging as the sun
my heart burns, my mind churns the events
Where is the love, what is beauty
who would care for life and death
in arrogance and the need for control

Fretting and fuming, driving me nuts
Suicide or murder sounds like good
but a bright smile of a child
can spoil such wonderful plans
We all are limited, we all are bound
no freedom, and darkness it should be
there aint choices, its the "gifted" path

I recall years ago I picked it up
a beautiful package with a green gem
so dazzling was it that it blinded me
I easily missed the big black stones
The green gem doesnt shine anymore
hands dirty, no escape from fate
and hey, who are you in the mirror?